DETERMINISM OR FREE WILL

Which do you prefer, believing or knowing?  If the world describes me in a particular way, giving me characteristics without ever having met, does that change who and what I am? Perfection in my thinking is so far off in the distance, some days it is barely perceptable.  I am a small, imperceptible particle in a very big expanding universe. So far, one of those particles that experiences consciousness (as far as we know).  No longer do I feel a need to absorb all there is to see and know. There is so much uplifting energy coming from strangers I know but don't know sharing their preoccupations and obsessions, leaning into details, telling me without telling me who and what they believe. But what resonates isn't what they've accumulated but what they are.  Genuineness, sincerity, authenticity matters so much more. Perhaps I prefer their company because those are traits I think any person would strive to exhibit. If only I were a cog in a machine; then I could expect every other cog would share equally the properties I have. I know people are troubled AI could out-perform the human brain. We have barely scratched the surface of that organ and have no idea of the full capability, except it functions unlike anything a binary system has been able to accomplish.  No sooner do I mention this, that ideas flood in- what potential are we not yet seeing? Since I don't know the 'code' that operates brain and mind function the best I can do is equate language with mind. Understanding is what we can do without ever reaching a destination. But isn't that an interesting metaphor?  Until we do, let's agree it deserves to be studied with respect for the magnitude if covers. I can tolerate the outrageousness of genius that makes significant contributions. Genius is isolating. But so is indifference to the things that matter most.